YOU MUST BE MISTAKEN, DONT YOU KNOW I AM A RULE FOLLOWER?

And we know that in all things God works for the good 

of those who love him, who have been 

called according to His purpose. ~ Romans 8:28

Okay Lisa, pull yourself together!  Call your momma, daddy and your daughters.  For several hours these words were echoing through my brain.  I didn't want to call. I didn't want to tell everyone all this horrible news.  I didn't want to be saying the words that were my truth.  I didn't want to be a failure.  I didn't want my family to feel all of these emotions, hurts and fears.  

When I finally put my big girl panties on and made the calls I needed to make, I felt like a small portion of this heavy weight was lifted off of my shoulders.  I had a team of prayer warriors and WE were going to get through this!  

After lots and lots of prayers and discussions and more prayers and a few more tears it is decided that I will move back to Texas.  My oldest daughter and sister (and her family) live in Lubbock, my parents still live in Big Spring and my youngest daughter will finish out her year at CU and then come to Texas for the summer (with hopes from this momma that she will decide to stay).   I very quickly get a job at a hospital.  It is not quite as good as the job I held previously, but it is a job and it is enough.  I can finally breathe again.  I am not crying myself to sleep every night.  There is the smallest glimmer of normal and happiness is steadily becoming a natural part of my days.  I am dealing with the loss I have suffered and I am leaning on God like never before!  

Within the first 90 days of employment I am given a promotion and a promise of another promotion within the next 3-6 months.  When asked......how are you?  I can honestly say without hesitation or a catch in my throat, "I am well. God is good."  It is funny how hind-sight, time and God's mercy can bring such clarity to a situation and true joy to your soul.  

Six months have past since I moved back to Texas and started my new job, things are going splendidly!  I have not only been promoted once, but 3 times which has increased my salary 2.5x my original offer.  My youngest daughter has in fact moved permanently to Texas and she has met a wonderful boy.  Yippee Skippee!   The holidays are so close I can smell the turkey and almost taste the pumpkin pie! More often than not, my heart is happy and my soul is at peace. 

It's the Tuesday before Thanksgiving and.....BOOM!  I am knocked to my knees once again! I am walking across the sky bridge and my phone rings.  It's a Colorado number.  I answer wondering what friend has a new number. The voice on the other end asks for me in a matter of fact, stern way. This is most definitely not a friend.  I tell him, "This is she."  I am thinking, oh my goodness what kind of trouble is #1 stepson in?  Historically when I get phone calls with the voice on the other end less than friendly, it is something related to a mess he has gotten himself in. To my utter disbelief, it is a detective asking me if I was in Colorado.  "No." I say. "Do you plan to come back anytime soon?" he asks.  In a shaky voice I respond, "Absolutely not! Why do you ask?" "Well, I need you to return because there have been charges filed against you.  You will need to come and turn yourself in." is the reply I hear from this stern voice. I beg the detective to give me more information and details.  The only response I receive is that the papers I had signed months before are now in the hands of the DA.  The voice on the other end softens just a bit (probably because I was crying so uncontrollably that he finally felt a little bit sorry for me), and he in a nearly compassionate tone suggests I should not come this week, as it is Thanksgiving in a couple of days and the docket will be backed up. He instructs me to be at the courthouse at 4:00 a.m. the Monday following Thanksgiving to turn myself in.    Trembling in disbelief and nauseous I hang up the phone and in the middle of the sky bridge fall to me knees and basically yell out to God.......are You kidding me?  

There is something you should know about me, I am a rule follower by nature.  I like rules.  In fact, my mom told me not too long ago that I have been a rule follower from the moment I was born.  I was born on the exact day I was due.  Doctors told my parents I should be born on March 6th and so it was.  From the moment I entered this world, that is how I rolled.   Growing up I was far from perfect, but I rarely got into any real trouble.  I was a rule follower and I hated to be in trouble.  I still hate it to this day.  Following the rules wasn't always fun, but I did it anyway!  

I went to parties and such as a teenager, but I was the one with the clenched jaw and shaky stomach when things started getting out of hand.  I was the girl that would pretend to pour a little something extra in my sonic drink and wipe the tiniest of drops actually left on my fingers from covering the hole of the bottle on her lips just in case someone was close enough to smell my 'breath' or walk around the party with a beer can in my hand that had its original contents swooshed down the drain and replaced with a splash of diet coke and water so it had a beer color should I accidentally spill it. I wanted to be with friends and hang out, I wanted to be cool; but more than anything, I didn't want to do anything to get me into trouble.  I had a knack for knowing just when things were about to get ugly.  Retrospectively, I know this was the Holy Spirit.  I probably saved more of my friends from getting in trouble than they really know.  When I got uncomfortable with the way things were going and my teeth started chattering through my clenched jaws, I was the one saying......Let's get out of here!  This isn't fun anymore, aren't you ready to leave? Those same people that I saved from being in trouble were very often annoyed with me.  Annoyed until we were driving away and passed police cars headed in the direction we just came from.   Oh, then they were thankful for a sober, rule following friend that begged them to leave just as things were getting 'good'.  I didn't want anyone to be in trouble.

One night I walk into a  party and there sat my sister.  My sister is 3 years younger than me.  She was a good girl, but she didn't worry quite as much as I did about getting into trouble or following rules.  I don't believe she was drinking, but she had been in a squabble with another girl.  During this little altercation, the other girl poured beer on her and she smelled like a brewery.  I couldn't stand the thought of her getting into trouble when she got home, so I literally drug her to the bathroom and MADE her wash her hair. Yes, right there at a party, I am forcing her to stick her head into a sink and let me wash the smell of beer out of her hair! I am sorry I embarrassed her that night, but I am not sorry that I loved her so much that I couldn't stand the thought of her getting in trouble when she got home. Thankfully, she forgave me for being a little bit crazy and we are the best of friends.

I was the girl that stopped at the pay phone to let my parents know if my plans changed.  I was never late getting home. I might be right on time, but not late. Well, I was never late until we moved and my drive was a bit further. My parents had sold our house and until they closed on the new house, we were living at the Whip In Camp Ground in our travel trailer which was about 12 miles outside the city limits.  During the first week of living a little further out in the country, I was late twice. I was grounded for the first (and only) time in my life. Being grounded was miserable enough, but grounded in a 32 foot travel trailer with my entire family squished together on a couch meant for 2, with no phone and rabbit ears for TV service was absolutely torture!  This just proved once again that rules are good and they should most definitely be followed. 

Still not my WORST day.

Rules are our friends, we should follow them.